Game: The Secret Island of Dr. Quandary

Year: 1992

Publisher: MECC

I used to play this game in elementary school when we had computer class, and I never finished it. I found it on my external hard drive while I was searching for my next game to review and couldn’t pass it up. It’s not abandonware, as it’s still being sold to schools and other “learning centers”, but it’s an old enough DOS game and it was time for me to face my equal, my nemesis, that bastard Dr. Quandary and that one stupid puzzle with the fly and bird that I just could not figure out when I was 12.

Now the premise of this game, for those who have not had the pleasure of playing the game previously, is you are in a carnival and are drawn to this one booth and the man calling you to it.

It's FREE - That's how these scams start!

Dr. Quandary challenges you to his “Troggle Shoot” game. It’s FREE - how could you not?! If you hit enough of the target Troggles you win a doll, I mean “Lifelike Action Figure”. The 3 dolls that you can choose from are appropriately named “B. Ginner”, “O.D. Nary” and “D. Feecult”. And when I said “win a doll” before, I actually meant “become the doll” and you are transported to The Secret Island of Dr. Quandary, (see what I did there?), and have to solve puzzles to escape.

The puzzles aren’t extremely difficult but are kinda annoying and repetitive. They range from “rebuilding” candles, a door or a boat from triangles and other shapes, to jumping up and knocking music

I HATE THIS PUZZLE SO I RAPED IT

notes into a pattern on a staff to the puzzle that would always give me issues - the puzzle to retrieve the frog eggs. I hate this puzzle so much, that I would literally want to smash the computer to bits with my little pre-teen fists. But I’m older now, wiser - so I took my time. Essentially you have to pick up a rock, and hit the fly. Hurl the fly at the frog’s mouth to open up the gate. Then hurl a piece of popcorn at the pterodactyl, (apparently still living a la Jurassic Park on Dr. Quandary’s Island), run where the gate used to black off and gather up the frog eggs. Oh, and there’s wind to deal with too. I was so pleased when I totally rocked it that I actually just raised my now 20-something fists in the air and did a quiet “yesssss” to myself.

Who Is The Idiot Here?

Most of the game is just meandering around the island figuring out puzzles, gathering the items that you need for the potion to make you human again, and meeting the people that are on the island. Guess it’s not all THAT secret! And then I came across this hot

Well, HELLO PRETTY LADY

tranny mess right before I had to do the music note puzzle. and then when I passed her anytime after that she made reference to the “beautiful music we made together” - can’t say I blame her. I know I’m awesome. (Cue another silent “yesssss” on my end.)

I started with the B. Ginner doll just to get reacquainted with the game, but easily beat that and the O.D. Nary. The game tries to be tricky with the items that you need to gather to make the potion by changing up the names. A “bucket of water” on the B. Ginner becomes “bilge water” on O.D. Nary. Tricky-tricky Dr. Q - but I caught onto that fast.

All in all, I destroyed all the puzzles and escaped Dr. Quandary and closed a chapter of my childhood.

Pros: Cute, fun if it’s the first time you’ve played it, does incorporate math and reasoning skills for teaching kids.

Cons: Replay value is almost nil, you want to punch Dr. Quandary in the face often, childhood scars if you can’t beat the puzzles.

The Secret Island of Dr. Quandary | Revenge | Puzzles